Monday, 23 July 2012

The Ass has Relocated

My one year contract as an Ass expired last week, so my Ass ass said bye bye to marketing and hello to job hunting! Luckily, I was able to find another job right away so that, other than three paid vacation days, I never had an unemployed work day.

You are now looking at a brand new Administrative Assistant!
Sidenote: Well, ok, you're not looking at me at all. Just look at the picture of me on the side bar, or picture me in your head. With clothes on, you pervert.
My job title is the same, only I now work for an Environment firm. Or something like that. Whatever it is, a lot of photocopying is invloved. I basically answer requests for information about the environment in our province. That would include information about specific regions, and the events that may have environmentally impacted that region.

Why the Eff is the octopus looking
for orange juice? Is this a common
occurence?
Unfortunately, I'm on contract yet again, and so am only promised work until the end of October.

Now here's some deets about my new job.
  • The office is a frigging maze. You know those labyrinths in your activity books when you were a kid? Yeah, its like that. I have to bring my paperwork down to the HR people, but I got lost trying to find them, so I just gave up and went back to my desk. Office: 1. Christine: 0.
  • I'm on a short contract because I'm filling in for someone who is on indefinite sick leave. Which means I'm sitting at the desk of someone who's already established here. The result is me, surrounded by family photos and decorations that are clearly not mine. I would pretend they are, but everyone in the photos/paintings/sculptures is Black, and mostly sporting dreadlocks. And let's face it, although I can dance like I got soul, I'm as White Girl as it gets.
    GIMME EVERYTHING YOU GOT, TROLLEY LADY!
  • In the afternoon, a trolley comes by with snacks. A FUCKING TROLLEY! It's like I'm in the middle of a train ride to Hogwarts. I almost squealed and asked for a chocolate frog. Instead, I just gave the weirdly-difficult-to-determine-age trolleyman an awkwardly huge smile and walked/skipped by him.  I hope I get into Ravenclaw *fingers crossed*
  • In our office building, there's a cafeteria. Bonus: they have an awesome salad buffet. Even better: the salad is super cheap! They make you pay by the weight of your plate; while my salad cost $2 without tax, a small bottle of apple juice and a coconut/chocolate chip cookie cost $3.
    • SOMEONE'S GONNA GET SKIN-NY! (I sang that part)
  • They didn't have much work for me to do on my first day here (the girl with access to the information requests is on vacation today) so I've been mostly looking at wedding stuff. But now, Andrew can't get mad, because I'm doing it for Swizzy. Because I'm a badass M-O-H. HOW DOES IT FEEL, ANDREW?
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P.S. In case you're wondering how much I need to pay for my salad in Wizarding money, here's a currency converter: http://www.hp-lexicon.org/wizworld/galleons.html
Answer: My salad would have cost 3 Sickles and 17 Knuts, tax included.

1 comment:

  1. A freaking trolley? That is insane. We don't get anything like that here.

    Ravenclaw is the best next to Gryffindor of course. :) Although my daughters would say that Slytherin is the one they would want, but they are a tad evil. We do all agree though that Hufflepuff's are the wallflowers of Hogwarts.

    Wow, I am a grown woman...who just bought the complete boxed set of all 8 movies to take with her on vacation. hahaha.

    Good luck with your new job. Although I'd love to say I hope you get to keep it, that would mean the other person is really ill and I wouldn't wish that on anyone. Instead I will wish that you have a great time in this job while a new one comes along! :)

    ReplyDelete

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