Saturday, 11 August 2012

Canadian Feature Friday: Weekly Culture Shock

I've been trying to think of a fun themed weekly post that I could start, like Wordless Wednesday or Flashback Friday. But hopefully more original. I feel like the structure will help me keep posting on the blog.

Like my boobs, I need structure in my life. No, wait. Boobs need support, not structure. My brain must have just wanted to subconsciously mention my boobs.

Boobs.

Anyways, I decided to do weekly posts about different parts of my identity. It'll either be about Canada in general (like today) or more specific, like the East Coat, New-Brunswick, being French Canadian,  etc. I'll be posting facts, photos, links, videos, whatever the hell else I find that's interesting and that others may not know. Cause it's my blog and I can do whatever I want.

To start this traditon, here's some facts about the land of the Maple Leaf:
  • Canada was invaded by the US two times, in 1775 and 1812. But we got even with the help of the British, who were pissed that the US was bullying us. They sent troops and burned down the White House in 1812. Take that, Bully Ancient Americans.
  • If you're beyond badass and actually downright fucked-up, you should go to Dawson City in Yukon (which is not even near where I live. There's no way you can associate this weird-ass shit with me.) There, you can join the “Sourtoe Cocktail Club”.  Requirement: you must finish a drink that has a dehydrated and severed human toe in it. I am not making this shit up. “You can drink it fast, you can drink it slow — but the lips have gotta touch the toe.”
    • If you want to hear about the toes donated to this "cause", click here. I'll let you go vomit now.
    Mike Myers at a NY Fashion Show walking the runway in a kilt,
    dog-eared hat and a Canadian hockey jersey. This is why I love him.
  • Jim Carrey is Canadian, but Canadians don't care, because he pretends he isn't. Mike Myers (aka Austin Powers) on the other hand is proud of his nationality, and we therefore love him.
    • We're also the home of Pamela Anderson and Justin Beiber, but let's ignore what I just said out of shame.
You're still vomiting thinking about the toe drink, aren't you?

Bonus Fact: The Moosehead Brewery in Saint John, New Brunswick, produces 1,642 bottles of beer per minute. This makes Andrew a very happy man. 

That's it for this week. Hopefully I'll actually keep this up. Unless no one likes these posts, then I'll stop doing it. After crying for hours.


2 comments:

  1. Omg that TOE... *vomits*

    No way I would drink anything that had even been in the same room as that toe. Why the eff would anyone.. Oh god.
    And it has to touch you?! TOUCH YOU? Oh... I'm done on my gross-out for the day, I can't take anymore.

    As an American, I would like to apologize for the ancient Americans who are assholes and bullies. I would also like to apologize for any current American assholes and bullies. Seems we have a few of those running about here still. ;D

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  2. That is disgusting and No, I did not click on the link. Some things you just don't need to know. :)

    I had no idea that Jim Carrey was Canadian! haha. :)

    And I concur with JCMC, sorry for ancient American Bullies. :) Although I think there may be more current American bullies. Bleh.

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