Thursday 29 March 2012

Oh! One Last Thing About Valentine's Day.. Cause I totally get distraOooh, a monkey!

Yeah, I started to write this over a month ago, but then one of the cats peed on Andrew's hunting pants, and I forgot about ever finishing it.
It was hilarious, by the way, because I was mad at Andrew that day. It's like the cat was dealing out the karma, so I sat there and let karma run its course.
Why Andrew would never cheat on me: respect, loyalty, and FEAR.
Anyways, back to Valentine's Day. After I had eaten the last nanaimo bar at the lodge, Andrew and I went back home to play on our computers. Because the best way to spend Valentine's Night is snuggling up to your computer.

Right?

No?

So instead of ending our night pathetically hugging our facebook page, Andrew suddenly sat up and said we needed to go to his parent's house to see Carter's Valentine's Day gift. For those who don't know, Carter is my three year old boyfriend.

So we took the whole one kilometer trip (.6 miles) to his parents' house. Once we walked in, the first thing we saw was this:



Oh. My. God.

Look at that adorable face.

I have never made so many high-pitched noises in my life. I'm actually surprised that I didn't start hysterically crying.


Can you tell I was born in the 80's?



Turns out that Carter's Valentine's Day gift was a future girlfriend. As Carter's current girlfriend, I should have been violently jealous. But there is no way I can feel any violent thoughts towards that little bundle of love and rainbows. If I did, I would have No Heart. Which would then mean I have unknowingly been the main villain from the Care Bear cartoon series all these years.




They hadn't named her yet, so Andrew and I helped them by suggesting names. I joked that they should name her after a gun, like we did with our cats.
They named her Remington.


Yes, I'm serious. I've created a hick monster.

But she's nicknamed Remi, which is actually quite cute. I am now in love with her as well, and I know that she loves me too, because she pees all over the floor everytime she sees me. Uncontrollable piddling means true love. Or urinary incontinence.

Now here's a video of me making really weird noises and  her reaction. You are permitted to make high-pitched noises.


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Also, I have pain in my left side. WebMD says I might have Pancreatitis, but thankfully, 95% of me thinks that's ridiculous.

6 comments:

  1. WebMD is always right. Just ask my Ebola.

    Also, you cannot comprehend the noises I am making looking at Carter's new filly!

    ReplyDelete
  2. You are legitimately insane...
    Also, that dog is freaking adorable! DO WANT.

    ReplyDelete
  3. AWWWW she's adorable! And confused! SO CUTE. I want.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I was watching your video and heard some weird noises... Turns out it was me squealing at the adorable Remi. So cute.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Okay that sign is the best sign ever! When I got divorced there was a friend that had some seriously nosey neighbors who would call my ex every time my car was at their house.

    The day it was final we put up a sign that said "To the nosey neighbors, the divorce is final, shut the fuck up"

    It was very gratifying in a redneck stupid way.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh my God, you are officially my hero! That is absolutely awesome, and I support that redneckery 100%!

      Delete

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