Parents at the Mall

Ok, so this is basically a rant against certain parents I see with their children at the mall. I saw all of this last weekend and it pissed me off so much that I didn't stop complaining for days. Andrew told me to leave him alone and to just write it on my blog. So TA-DA!

Acceptable for the mall?  Uh, no.

1. Clean your children. I saw a kid at the mall with a face full of dried up chocolate and ice cream. Was he currently eating? No. It was dried up. It looked like he ate an entire Dairy Queen for breakfast, and it was 2 pm at that point. Is it really that hard to clean your kid? Keep a few baby wipes on hand? Bring your kid to the restroom to clean them up? Hell, even do that gross grandma thing where you lick your thumb then rub the dirty off with it. Cause letting your 6 year old kid run around the mall with a dirty face makes us wonder how bad is the rest of the family's hygiene. Body odor? Skid marks?! (Yeah, I went there. You're welcome for the mental image.)

2. Dress your kids. This is also a hygiene issue, but is mostly a laziness thing. Why can't you dress your kids before going out in public? Really, why? I saw what looked to be a 9 year old in FULL PAJAMAS. It may have even been a onesie. But it wasn't only him. He appeared to have two younger siblings, all decked in pajamas. These were clearly from the night before (cause really, why would you make your kids start the day out in fresh pajamas?) and like I said, it was around 2 in the afternoon. The mom was all decked out like she was Victoria Beckham. Cause clearly, she had to look her best for the paparazzi. Stupid Posh-Spice wannabe (if you wanna be my lover.. )

I totally had this picture as a poster when I was a kid.

3. DON'T LEASH YOUR KID! I'm going to try real hard to not turn this into an angry rampage. But I can't make any promises. I saw multiple parents at the mall with their toddlers and young children on leashes, walking them like a dog.

For Godsake, just don't make them sing.

Now why in the world do you need to leash your child?! Unless you need a walker or cane to walk, you're child is mentally disabled or disturbed, or you have 5+ kids like the Wharvey Girls in "O Brother, Where Art Thou?", you have absolutely no excuse for using a leash. Are you really so lazy that you can't keep an eye on your child, hold its hand or carry it? Is it really so difficult to keep an eye on your child that you have to put them in a cute backpack that has a rope attached to it? These women only had one child, or if two, the second one was much older and able to take care of itself at the mall.

Seriously, I've seen women with more kids than the Von Trapp Family Singers deal with their children in public without restraining them in halters. So what makes the other woman so incapable to deal with one child? If you want to use a leash so bad, buy a goldfish! CAUSE CLEARLY YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE THE CAPABILITIES TO HANDLE A DOG!

Now that I've resorted to "yelling", I'm gonna stop myself now. But c'mon people, don't leash your child. Don't. Do not. Okay, I'm acutally done now.