Saturday, 12 November 2011

This Moment is Brought to you by Dental Floss

This is about the kinda-ish courtship of Andrew and I.

I met my hick boy on his grandparents' dairy farm (of course) while four-wheeling (what else would it be?) with a friend, Miss Love, from university. Andrew is Miss Love's first cousin, twice removed with a dude on the side or something like that.

Anyways, we met, and it was attraction at first sight. Both of us found any excuse to go four-wheeling. Andrew would always offer to drive me home at the end, even though he lived just 5 minutes away and I lived 40.

We were both idiots when it came to reading the "he/she is so into you" signs. (I'm not actually talking about he-shes here. Plus, that's mean, the correct term is transgenders, or drag queens ....or hermaphrodites?... I actually have no idea what a he-she is. A google image search didn't help either.)

Anyways, this one time, we were four-wheeling alone (ooh la-la! I can say that, because I'm French) when he took me to a waterfall (Double ooh la-la!). I, being a show-off that was not about to act all ladylike and shit, decided to climb the side of the waterfall. Andrew, being a country boy, followed. He probably wanted a better view of my ass too, but meh.

We now regualarly fish here. And by "we", I mean Andrew
fishes and I take pictures the whole time.

So there we were, sitting side by side next to this gorgeous waterfall, talking. My stomach was all a-flutter, like there was a giant insect concert going on in there, butterfly mosh-pit included. He starts smiling at me and looking at my mouth all the time, which means he wants to kiss me. (I read that somewhere, so it's true.)

He leans in. Looks at me in the eyes. This is it. And says:
"You have a bug in your teeth."
We did not have our first kiss that day.


Also, two years later, Andrew tells me someone hung themselves there years ago. He sure knows how to romance a girl.


  1. I love your boyfriend.

  2. So yeah, a couple of days ago I totally thought some guy was going to ask me out but instead he told me I had gum on my butt.

    Which was fine because I'm married anyway.

    But still...


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